“Dear Ms. Marty Pants,
We can only have two guests at graduation, but my whole family wants to go! What do I do?
Sincerely, Graduating Student”
Dear Graduating Student,
I totally understand. Graduating is a big deal, and your whole family should be able to go and support you! My advice is to fail your classes this semester and stay another year. Hopefully by next year’s graduation, you’ll be able to invite your whole family!
“Dear Ms. Marty Pants,
I just moved off campus and really want a cat, but I don’t think I have time to take care of one. Should I still get one?
Sincerely, Indecisive Student”
Dear Indecisive Student,
My advice is to convince your roommate to get a cat instead. You’ll get all the furry cuddles with none of the responsibility!
“Dear Ms. Marty Pants,
I’m really feeling the lack of spring break, especially its effect on my mental health. I feel like I’m constantly on the verge of tears and don’t even have time to cry. How can I prevent burnout?
Sincerely, Exhausted Student”
Dear Exhausted Student,
I hear ya! Since there’s no spring break, there’s really no time to catch up on work, get ahead or simply relax. Suppressing your emotions can lead to burnout in itself, so if you don’t have time to cry, my advice is to get creative. For example, just the other day I was able to fit in a quick, efficient cry between classes while walking across campus! As far as preventing burnout, there’s no time for that either, so I’d advise to just keep pushing through and save the inevitable breakdown for the summer!
Sincerely, Ms. Marty Pants.
Ms. Marty Pants is an expert on life and loves to give back to the community with her acclaimed problem-solving skills. Email any questions to Ms. Pants’s secretary at fiacovacci@my.okcu.edu.
Leave a Reply