The government will reopen from the 2018 government shutdown soon, but here are some ideas of ways students can take advantage of the next one.
1. Go hiking for free
National Park trails are still open during the government shutdown, unlike the one in 2013. You can hike at America’s best locations for free! Good thing OCU is so close to all the national parks.
2. Pee outside
Though the parks are open, their visitor centers and bathrooms will shut down. This is the perfect opportunity for you to practice your outdoor squatting skills.
3. Come out of hiding from the IRS
No one is audited during a government shutdown, so live it up while it lasts! Drink, party, gamble, and spend some more money to write off on your next tax form.
4. Start a restaurant with as many sketchy menu items as you want
Food safety inspections are delayed during the shutdown, so it’s the perfect time to start that Oklahoma sushi and shark kabob food truck you’ve always wanted.
5. Transfer to West Point
West Point instructors don’t show up for class during a government shutdown, so you’d be free of homework and commitment!
6. Get stuck abroad
Overseas consulates could be forced to close, preventing those abroad from returning to the U.S. Grab a flight and get stuck in Spain before it’s too late.
7. Start your own museum
Several zoos and museums close during a shutdown, so people are in need of some replacement entertainment. Gather all your childhood belongings and create your own museum. What’s more interesting than you?
8. Do something risky like exploring a mine
Has your life been too drab recently? Spice things up with a little life-threatening trip to a mine. The Occupational Safety and Health Administration stops routine workplace inspections and investigations during a shutdown, so you’re on your own.
9. Keep marching
Crowd control will still be provided for First Amendment activities, so keep the Women’s March going.
Comment below with more ways to use a government shutdown to your advantage.